Yes!! I will marry You…..

Though India is on the treadmill of progress and development and words like economy, growth, industry, plans, jobs and bla!! Bla!!! Are in charcha ……I wonder when will the scenario of our arrange marriage would change, even apps or technology needs to be upgraded after a lapse of time so why not our way of approaching to “beta ye hai wo jiske sath tujhe is jalim duniya ka samna krna hai!!!”

I miss that proposal system which I grew up looking at (of course!! Not in reality but in movies and telly soaps which has a major share in building up my thought process and setting up my expectations) among the Indian middle class families….why is it that no one feels  bored after being the part of same idiotic, show-off drama which is repeated by every generation with no upgrade or update or alteration to it.
So here’s what happen in India….boy’s family comes to girls home with all his relatives who have plenty of time to waste wearing a fixed smile.  The girl becomes the show piece accomplished with one of best outfit and make-up and the guy is then there in market ready to be sold out with a fare price that will fill his house and life with gifts and luxury and of course comfort that he may get all by himself some time near his retirement time.
so during the betting hours, the girl needs to decide of giving a red or green signal to her family so to make a quick decision about where will this train of “marriage” will head towards……….BTW this all happens in around 15 minutes- without wasting time you see!!…. 😀

And in these 15 minutes the girl is expected to think if she would be okay in spending her next 50-60 years with this cage-man, the considerable factors available to her will be

  • Height- If he’s tall, good enough as heels would be in the shopping list and if         not- much better- money saved!!!
  • Weight- If He’s overweight….oops!!! I mean healthy (coz He’s A GUY!!!- Living MALE SPERM!!!!! And so We don’t have the right to judge him anyway) which makes this the observation as CHUBBY and khate pite ghar ka hai bnda!!!
  • Skin Completion- If he reminds you the different dairy products (Panner, milk, ice-cream) or reminds the list of natural remedies where he should be dumped into a pool of Turmeric and honey (have no guarantee if this would even work)…….
  • How is voice is like- as in his voices is more like a cow or crow!!!!!………(Pretty obvious it would be like a man!!
    But then what else do you have to judge him…….

Sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I forgot the package he earns per year- a very important factor which the guys family will not forget as that plays an important role in fixing up the selling price…… 😀

Now here comes the idiotic part everyone in room knows no one is going to eat or drink anything but still the notion of “Aatithi devo bhav!!!” will be all over the place, which will end up being the snacks for the host family after the guests leaves.

The whole shot-off drama is actually practised so to let people know “how socialise people we are” where instead of thinking or caring if the would-be-wife/husband is buying any of it.

Guys in India these days have expressed to marry an educated girl who would love to let her degrees fade away in order to receive the higher studies of being a full time made, who over the years becomes the ultimate reason for every wrong thing happening in the world where the man-of-the-house (in a decent sarcastic manner!!!!) has no role to play in being responsible in any way.

In a recent study it’s been found that if any couple thinks of being parents and wants a healthy baby, more than the mother  would-be-father needs to quit smoking, drinking and should start working out regularly as the sperm do have an important role which results in the health of the baby………but all the restrictions are still laid on the woman, even the “ so any good news…..??” type irritating questions are to be answered by the female as if the reason of her existence is not to teach the lessons she had learnt to the next generation (as we live long then our reproductive age!!) but to help growing population of the country and ofcourse helping the family (MALE”S family!!) name alive as if life will perish if you thought of anything else like adopting a kid or being a part of some cause and so on…

The society would need more 100 years to actually start practising the equality concept where women are no less than any man which brings one to choose from staying as women and start nodding your head to the most well guy (as per unknown people around!) or to opt for a surgery (sex changing one!).







From me to MEEEEE!!!!!

Samanta 20170831_120015.jpgAfter rolling out n number of years, i am again on the same place with a few grown up perceptions and ideologies which knows about the existence of the grey area in life now. From searching the alphabets in the keyboard to growing faster in typing to trying to be sorry after i do a blunder. Eventually, from who cares to OMG! i am being noticed by all possible genders existing in the universe.

16th Oct 2017: This new “Me” is more confident, compassionate, challenging the usual things, dis-liking the usual things and living life the way it comes to her.
Just for the records the promise of making me the priority has been made keeping the inspirational quote from some famous Karan johar’s movie “how will you keep the people happy if the one inside you is suffering”.

Me before this grown up was more sought of frustrated “For no reason to be tired, but I’m tired again, ever complaining:- why do I settle for less when I know my craving will wake again… and some more:- Have I lost it, or it’s in my very nature to repeat the same mistake…why don’t I refuse and start it all over again; what holds be back…what does my heart say??
Some more of more from the never published:- will I ever be able to hear the bell ringing or I ll b among those who went in the name of fate…”

Plus when you get to read lines like “About Me” well…..i’m a freak, insane human who’s trying to find her reason for existence, have newly found my interest of writing or should i say penning down things going inside my head, I’m humorous by nature but now i feel i’m too grown up or people surrounding me aren’t and so no one understands the humor part anymore 😀 ……Here i am giving my head a pinch of satisfaction by revealing all the lame thoughts disturbing me enough to make a way out…….well!!! have a long way to go now ….so let’s start ;)” written by you ages ago, you know you strong enough to stay mad at all point of life 😉
A quick update on what different happened, i decided to change my long stayed single status to “booked up, plz try some other time” status. As the smiley faced guy and the one i use to poke for all my professional doubts became one of my “3 mistakes of my life” after a series of unknown emotions and rollercoaster ride from the place called nowhere came up too join the adventure along with serious disturbance and confusion. Secondly, a new cycle named “HERO” was added to my life after many years after my blue coloured cycle named “BEAUTY” was gifted out to a known and less known family friend of daddy dear. Third and most important and started feeling more responsible, caring and all other feelings one associate with mother (Bollywood effect!!!) as my baby niece entered our life along with poop and potty some days before.


The search….

In the miserable world, where every soul is in the constant race of check post life and doing all as one is expected; I find myself as a tortoise, one who’s slow and is lagging behind others. The constant urge to prove yourself brings along a load of self-expectation and results mostly into depression following with constant failures. It’s same 24 hours a day everyone gets to work on either on themselves or on something better they are good doing at and I do none of the both as my time flies doing house chores having zero value.

I wonder if the search reaches its destination making one feel fulfilled and satisfied. No doubt, I don’t fall into that line as there’s nothing I have ever achieved nor have ever extended my comfort zone other than making some professional decisions based on my family cum emotional needs.

Now here I am 23 years old Indian woman, at a stage where I hold nothing to be honoured off. The self-doubt grabs and makes me wonder whether I am worth of anything? Or I fall into a line born to help others rise and watch them waving at you and making you realise that you did nothing.

The one I search for at this point is the identity, the extension of which will define ME!!

The circle of LIFE

The constant circling of stuffs in the same diameter with the same radius for n number of ages/time/days/weeks/minute is what defines a normal human life where the power of acceptance is the key to make yourself feel relatable to all the nonsense things you being a part of. Somewhere today I did read “truth is, life is not fair”. Nevertheless it’s quite true and with this unfair life we live in, the trick is to stay happy with whatever you have or being content irrespective of the very nature or habit of comparison.
Today I am a 23 year old lady, a age where are expected to be mature enough to deal with your problems with a smile but I behaving like an alien have just learnt and have sharpened my talent of complaining. Sitting here thinking what should have I done or must have done in past, I am clear that nothing goes as I plan or things I can but instead of choices I make purely based on my emotional and personal things influencing the quality of decisions ever taken. Though I believe in going with gut feeling, surely your gut doesn’t give you a guarantee card and may end you up feeling guilty along with felling gutsy about inviting self-doubt on your own worth.
No its not just losing your side, you gain the best possible stuffs called as moments for life, the possibilities of being felt needed in personal life and bla bla…which are to keep in your heart in the dearest section and can’t be measured accurately in any invented scales till date.
The fun part between this tragedy is that the job portals where I too as any longing candidate or jobless person would have a desperate profile in order to grab any recruiter’s attention by god’s grace and end up earning financially along with the much desired respect where the dear and not so dear one’s, I get 75 recommended jobs which ends up being a circle itself called numerically as ZERO.
Mid of these ongoing confusions, complaints, sleepless nights and void I gain the knowledge of being happy with I want rather than all I can or possibly get, a small step in being content I guess and the life goes on.

Religion -path made to help us not to deviate from good…..

Among the good things in being an INDIAN, the best is that you get to know a number of things related to many things like religion, the different ways people worship the all-mighty and learn to respect all irrespective of your personnel opinion or belief and dis-beliefs.

Celebrating countless festivals and wishing good wishes every time with a natural smile is in our genes i guess, well personally among the list my favorite is Ganesh Pooja/ Chaturthi, which reminds me of my 6th class where i took part in Rakhi making competation for the first time and show cased my creativity where i used a leaf of money plant and different Dals (pulses) and made lord ganesh……..ended up being 3rd in that competion too.

The second good memory is about my first fast (upwas), when i was in 8th class………lol…my elder siso ended up vomiting and cursing me for eating or should i say filling my mouth with stuffs so badly that the sight made her vomit out….. 😀
well after that i never ever tried fasting as hunger is among those things which i have no control on…….  😉

The word Ganesh also reminds me of the novel i fell in love with- shiva trilogy!!! where Lord Ganesh is called as the Lord of Nagas……the character which adds a flavour of suspence, love, respect and responsibility as the story proceeds.

And today is again a day to create memories under the same caption…..looking forward with a wink 😉

Try till you get the doubt that you can’t…..

The chances of loosing again or should i say the possibilities of being a failure makes me think about my decisions or should i say doubt my own judgement abilities. Reading inspiring and motivating stories and articles do help a bit but then its’s again back all fresh and new.The key to overcome this feeling of knocked out could only be achieved by continue the push or getting up and doing it without thinking much or even giving it a second thought.

Have the guts to follow your heart, it knows where your happiness lies and where you need to reach and when we dream something different or unique by accepting the inner voice, which refuses to follow the herd or the predictable path other chooses, the need of working hard, very hard arouses.

As the winner is one who failed once to succeed but never gave up on trying one more time. So stop worrying about failures  and don’t give up……TRY ONE MORE TIME!!!

positive thinking is necessary but that’s not enough………positive actions are also required !!!

Don't fear to loose  fight hard!!!………….this time for yourself…..  🙂

steve jobs speech- An inspiration

keep looking……dnt settle…

connect d dots…
believe—-the dots will connect down the road……

love wt u do….true satisfaction- do wat u belive is a grt wrk- if u hven’t found——keep looking n dnt settle.
pride, fear ll fall away….coz u ll die, u r already naked, ders no reason to nt folloow ur heart.

the nw is u….bt someday u ll b old n cleard away creating a way for new…ur tym is limitd….so dnt live sumone else’s life

hve d courage to follow ur heart, dey sumhw already knw wat u truly wnt to becum- believe in urself more dn anyone else do!!!

stabilty and maturity relationship

For the first time in 20 years i’m feeling this- My mind is stable, so relaxed that am not bothered about anything anymore like a new born baby, the feeling which makes you feel more closer to oneself- now somewhere inside i know what i want or where my likeness lies, what i really want for myself. There’s nothing to prove anything to anyone anymore……

sometimes you just need to let yourself set free or loosen up, it helps by making peace with the past and calming down your soul and then only you reach a stage where the interest lying inside you finds the required confidence and inner voices reaches you…

The same comes an individual with time, patience and most importantly with experience, at the same time the key to gain both one needs to give time to himself/herself by observing and introspectiong 🙂

i see me

Every human Is made of tiny cells, this may be  the reason I can relate to all by some or the other reason. Be it a mom combing her tiny taught’s  not-so-dense hairs and the kid showing his anger because the sharpness of the bristles made him feel pain or my maternal aunt missing her first born who didn’t come wth her along wth her two other siblings to a party where one of the dishes was her favourite, or when a lady tries hard to pluck guava and after succeeding she gives the victory cup to her child saying “he likes guava” ………..these are some of the incidences which is so similar that I feel like a movie is playing in front of me where the scene is same with the same script but the actors and the crew members have changed. 🙂

Hello world!

Umn!!!!!!! so the REASON for this is…………………..( I have no clue about it!!! )

The urge of writing came after i realised that on one hand where majority loves to be people pleasing i am more like being what I’m and so fails to fill the basic criteria to be one of them. This made me taking out time for myself and now that i’m addicted to it, i don’t want to go back and think about how they are able to where the mask even in the day-light ???……….. I fear loosing myself in the crowd which have less or no influence in the way i am….

Writing helps me understand myself better and know my own needs and happiness from a closer way….Although i got some people who would like to see me as an author too… bt i doubt that !!!

The craving of writing or should i say expressing myself inside out needs polishing….i do realize that there is a long road ahead to be taken, and deep down inside would like to come up as a writer someday, writing about something usual in an unusual way………..  🙂

Happy blogging!